“Hysteria” and the Strange History of Vibrators
In this case of vibration speeds and patterns, more does not necessarily equal better. Sure, it can be fun to mix it up from time to time, but clicking through 11 different settings if you accidentally hit a button mid-masturbation isn’t exactly the definition of a good time. Still, if you’re someone who likes a vibrator that’ll keep you on your toes, having the variation can be nice. Likely, you don’t need us to list the virtues of having a vibrator you can rely on — the benefits of getting yourself off speak for themselves. Even if you’re proud of the sex toy stash you’ve built up, confronting the sheer number of options when it comes to picking out a new vibe is overwhelming.
If you’re on the hunt for a sexy toy that serves as a body massager and powerful sex toy, this VUSH wand will deliver on both fronts. It has five varying levels and 10 optimised vibration patterns to explore plus, it features an ergonomic body so you can wiggle, pump and slide it around for up to two hours. Unlike a lot of other wands this one is waterproof, which means you can take it into the bathtub for ultra-wet sessions — alone or in partnered sex. Made from smooth, squishy, body-safe silicone, it offers five suction intensities and five vibration patterns to suit your preference.
“The angled tip can be tilted for pinpointed pleasure, or you can roll the vibrator across erogenous zones like your nipples, perineum, or vulva for a more smooth and diffused sensation,” she says. There’s a huge range of insertable vibrators and sex toys that target this zone, including dual-stimulation ones (like rabbit vibrators), curved toys , and models with bulbous heads that pulse or thrust. A popular option for power-hunters, this 13-inch wand has four intensity settings and four vibration patterns. It also has a flexible neck that lets you apply pressure at different angles for a more targeted sensation. It has a cord, so you never have to worry about it crapping out on you mid-session.
Not only is it made from recycled materials in a green-powered factory, the brand promises to plant a tree with every purchase and it offers a repair and recycle scheme. What’s more, the base is compatible with all Love Not War detachable heads, so you can mix things up depending on your mood. I stand by the fact that it didn’t really need an upgrade in the first place, but the waterproof design is especially welcome. The 40-minute battery life just isn’t enough some days, but I might be greedy. Frankly, I don’t need more than a couple minutes with the Vesper 2 to orgasm, so unless I’m making it a whole hour-long sexual self-care session, 40 minutes is enough.
The bottom button’s sole purpose is to cycle backward through the aforementioned settings—a lifesaver when you wish to revisit a prior setting without cycling through 14 other settings along the way. The small, sleek Satisfyer Purple Pleasure vibrator is an excellent value at a typical price of $40 (a similar model from a different manufacturer that we’ve tested retails for $90), yet it makes no sacrifices in quality. With its aesthetically pleasing streamlined shape, waterproof silicone body, and USB rechargeable battery, this toy looks and feels like a more expensive “luxury” vibrator.
Plus, it could also provide that hands-free me-time experience I so craved. If you’d rather be free of cords, however, the Hitachi rechargeable or Le Wand is for you. Both can go for three hours at a full charge, which also takes three hours to complete.
The Hitachi, meanwhile, may not look cute at first glance, but that wand is recognizable anywhere. The classic look has been around for more than 50 years; when a sex aficionado sees a white toy with blue accents, they know right away it’s the Hitachi. The Doxy viberator, for example, can be highly personalized and comes in bright purple or pink. If you want a wand that’s a little extra, the Doxy could be for you.